American gun owners are some of the stupidest mother fuckers in the known world. It’s a statistically proven fact that 46% of accidental deaths – including children – are committed by the so called “responsible” gun owners of this country. Honestly the people who own guns and are making kids think they need guns in order to “be safe” are one of the reasons I’m such a god damn weeaboo. In japan there are almost no gun related homicides accidental or premediated because guns are illegal there. And even without guns Japan still has one of the lowest crime rates on planet earth coming in 7th in the global piece index out of all 160 states across the globe. Whereas America ranks 94th. Don’t believe me? Check it out:
Wikipedia Global Peace Index
In America there have been, 9,674 gun related deaths this year so far while in japan there have been only 11. That’s right 11! And let’s face it, gun owners are making this happen more often. You mother fuckers are consistently making up bull shit to keep killing tools in our houses and streets. Like the mystical home defense or hunting when there is no need for either. Or you run with the ignorant “guns are manly” bullshit like the dumb guerrillas a lot of you guys are these days.
But to be honest, truth be told, I don’t hate gun owners, not at all as a matter of fact. I just think there another group entertaining higher level moron’s. I seriously hold gun owners in the same regards as I hold drunks and druggies. There funny to watch. They can’t live without something that can get them and other people killed. The thing is gun owners are actually doing people like me a huge favor: There getting stupid people like themselves killed.
Since I’m a misanthropist…I love it when people die. The death of an idiot is something I love to hear about more than anything. Not even buying a $2,000 winning lottery ticket would make me as happy as hearing the news of a Ghetto Black, Douchebag Muscle Car Freak or a Dumb Blonde dying an untimely fear filled death. Especially if their getting killed because of circumstances that could’ve been completely avoided if they or other people hadn’t been so god damn stupid. And let’s face the facts here: Gun toting mother fuckers are helping shit like this happen. Look at gangbangers! That shits getting tough guy niggers and Latino beaners killed daily. And I love it!
And you’re probably wondering how I can be so heartless towards people. Well, look at it from a segregated smart person’s point of view. People like me are looked down upon and ridiculed for having such beliefs: That the common average American should be banned from using firearms unless their profession requires them. And even if you’re profession does require them there is still no need to take them home with you. Apparently I’m such an ignorant fool for thinking that having no guns on the streets would make us safer. That it is bullshit to think anyone not owning a gun is just asking to be robed or murdered by some crazy prick. Or the most popular: That I’m a pussy because I’m a man that actually dislikes something that is retardedly considered “manly”.
So when people accidentally kill themselves or their family members using the same tools I get called foolish for speaking out against, you bet your ass off I’m going to laugh. It’s karma at its finest. And it’s oh so sweat. I’m like Eric Cartmen when it comes to gun owners who have lost family or friends due to their own stupid gun crazy retardation. I would literally lick the tears from the face of a man who has accidentally shot his wife with the very gun he was teaching her how to use and gloat about his stupidity while onlookers shake their heads in disgust towards my heartlessness. Why should I have a heart for someone who is gleefully enthusiastic about something that is meant for getting people killed? I love the fact that gun owners are dying prematurely. And let me guess, you don’t think this shit like this happens often?
Read it and weep mother fuckers. Most of this is pretty recent:
I’m sure a lot of you aren’t even going to bother reading all these. Who likes to keep up with current events or at the very least reading in general right? But if you honestly think that these accidents are simply just isolated incidents and have nothing to do with you. You’re an idiot. You’re lumped into the same category as these people because you have the same potential for hilarious fuck ups exactly like these just because you own a gun. My personal favorite is the one involving the women and her bra. It’s just funnier when this shit happens to women, especially if it has anything to do with her tities.
And there are also numerous other cases of accidental deaths that happen almost daily that aren’t even covered by the media. If you can’t admit that at least three people die in America every day from an accidental gun discharge or average gun violence then you people are as dumb as a lot of you look.
But anyway back to the case in point. If you’re not a cop on duty in known gang territory or a fucken soldier stationed in a foreign country you do not need to own a fire arm! So I figured I might as well have some fun and post some of the stupid arguments the average gun owners have made to me over the years. Figured I would have a little fun debunking them. I’m sure you’ll laugh at some of my statements but who cares. I’m used to you peoples bullshit.
Guns don’t kill people, people kill people.
Yeah, guns just make it exponentially easier than any other tool. Like 120x easier. With guns you don’t have to get up close and personal with your target. You cocksuckers never seem to think that it’s all a matter of fear. No way would a weak little man who wants to kill a big tough looking black guy with tattoos and muscles actually have the balls to face him in hand to hand. People rely on guns more than any knife or close quarters weapon because it’s simply easier and less of a risk. It’s much easier to kill a fucker from a nice safe distance rather then get within his grabbing range. That’s why there are so many more statistically categorized homicides involving guns then there are knives. It makes killing a cake walk.
If we ban guns, we should also ban knives and other cutting objects, explosives materials and other harmful items that could put lives at risk.
I wonder how many uses a Kitchen knife has compared to a handgun. I should try cutting cheese and making a sandwich with a Glock. Or maybe I should try chopping some lettuce with a 12 gauge tactical. Oh wait! Fire arms aren’t meant for such things. Guns only have one use and one use only: Taking lives.
A lot of people like to make a “Kitchen knife vs Combat knife” argument with me believe it or not. And yes combat knives are used for Killing. Killing SOLDIERS!
The grip on the handle of a standard US Marine Combat knife is to better prevent from slipping out of the hand during a knife fight. Kitchen knives don’t have that. Plus the length of an average kitchen knife is longer then a combat knife and there blades are thinner because combat knives are meant to slip past rib cages to better pierce organs. Combat knives are different then standard kitchen knives. Plus there is already a law against combat and ballistic knives:
switchblades and ballistic knives are banned from interstate shipment, sale, or importation, or possession within the following: any territory or possession of the United States, i.e. land belonging to the U.S. federal government; Indian lands (as defined in section 1151 of title 18); and areas within the maritime or territorial jurisdiction of the federal government, with the exception of federal, state law enforcement agencies and the military.
Kitchen knives and combat knives are two different instruments. One’s a combat tool the others a cooking tool.
Then we have household explosives ingredients, poisons, etc and anything you can buy at a fucken grocery store. Yes there are all forms of methods for killing people. But still a lot of them are meant for specific uses other than hurting people. I see no other use for a gun other than taking a life. But who the fuck said we should focus on one thing more than the other really. Anything that doesn’t have an everyday household use shouldn’t be allowed in the home. Unless you know how to kill someone with a PlayStation or some shit this argument is bullshit.
We need our guns to protect ourselves from home invaders.
No you don’t. I myself am perfect proof of that. I’m a fat ass slow geek with no training with anything other than non-lethal weapons. But I’ve still fended off two separate home invasions – one where the prick had a knife – with nothing but an X2 Taser and a baseball bat. I ended up holding the second attacker down with my foot while I called the police. So I won both times with NO gun. If a weak ass dork like me can take down a guy holding a knife without a gun when you can’t. Who is the real weak one here? All you need is a Taser a bat and a will to beat the shit out of someone until there entire body is one big bruise. And I’m sure you dumb asses are going to pop on with the whole “what if they have a gun instead of a knife” shit. Do you not see the contradiction in that statement? If guns were made much harder to obtain by civilian hands they would have only close quarters weapons to choose from.
And you know what! Let’s just pretend for a second that you do ever need a gun for the fabled home defense in an America where guns are abolished from citizen use. I’m never going to understand someone who thinks they need a shotgun or a semi-automatic rifle to fend off an intruder. Do you really think you need to sound off the cock of a shotgun in order to make the fucker get the picture? That you need the fucken heavy fire power of a Carbine to make one or two guys get the fuck out of your house. No, all you need to do is hold a simple little handgun – preferably a revolver – up to their face and tell them to fuck off. I’m sure they’ll get the picture. But no. One little gun is not “badass” enough right? You have to have something big and powerful. Because you’re never an american without some type of power.
Plus are you guys that daft to not realize 90% of smart criminals look for homes that are not occupied? Not only is it a statistically proven fact it’s also common god damn sense.
We are able to have guns because it’s our second amendment right given to us by our founding fathers.
It’s amazing how many of you mother fuckers don’t look at the deeper picture when it comes to history. Sure you’ll learn whatever gets your irritating ass a passing grade in high school but you dickheads never look at one little fact. What the fuck do you think it’s called “history”? The founding fathers were sanctioned around 1787 during the American Revolution when shit had hit the fan and people were killing each other left and right. So of course those mother fuckers weren’t taking into consideration peace and prosperity over 230 years later when all we want are things to calm the fuck down. They weren’t concerned with the fact weapons could become more lethal as time went on nor the fact that they couldn’t foresee all the work they put into America as long since backfired. Those fat big wigs are dead. It’s time to fucken rewrite this bullshit anew to fit with the times. Aren’t we supposed to be a “civilized” and “evolved” society? What is civilized about living with a god damn gun in a home with four small children?
Hell did you even know that a few of those big wigged mother fuckers owned slaves? With the only acceptation being Franklin who later abolished it in the 1790’s so if you’re a fan of them you’re fan of slavery. The use of guns being in the hands of the common people is outdated just like slavery and other bullshit of the dark ages.
Is it one of those “it’s not right until it benefits me” kind of deals?
And plus it’s called “amendment” for a reason. It can be changed. But no one likes change! It’s just to fucken scary. Gun toting dick heads aren’t able to fathom the possibility that with some fucken money and people who give enough of a fuck, the fear of guns could be completely eradicated. But no, people are two cowardly or poor to attempt such a feat. Not because of safety mind you. But because douchebags just have to have big guns to make them feel powerful. It’s not AT ALL a matter of just feeling safe. We have to teach (or kill) the tough guys that think a big gun well take precedents over their small dick.
We need our firearms if our government is to begin a wave of tyranny.
This is by far the stupidest logic anyone can put forth. Tell you what! If you can show me how to shoot down an MQ-1 Predator drone with your pissy little 45. Cal – or at you’re best an AK47 – then I’ll believe you can take on the government. The government has soldiers and unlimited resources at their control along with the CIA and other aspects that I’m sure you (and maybe even I myself) are too out of the loop to comprehend. If you think you can take on the government with a militia of even 50 people you are too stupid to comprehend.
But honestly I think it’s wonderful to be that stupid. To think you’re invincible and that nothing can stop you. Sadly a a few of of us think logically. We’re already living under tyranny anyway. Look at the unemployment rate, the number of people forced to live in poverty, all the innocent Negros (kind of) getting killed by the cops. We are a country that is already a god damn police state. The tyranny is already here my friends and people are not standing up to jack shit. And if there smart they never will. We’re already prisoners.
Criminals are going to get a hold of guns no matter what laws or regulations are put into effect. So why bother?
You can’t simply just up and disarm citizens like they did with the Australian Gun Ban of 1996. You have to first shut down any illegal weapon vendors, closely monitor boarders to prevent illegal arms from making their way into the country, constantly monitor possible sources and crack down on the act of selling weapons illegally and lengthen the sentence of owning and selling said weapons to 20 to 30 years. If the sentence were made more severe the prices of weapons would skyrocket as these vendors are risking 20 to 30 years in prison should they get caught and charged. And finally – after all that is done – assure that the public are aware of these extreme measures and feel safe enough to let the government proceed with disarming the citizens. But no one has the money nor the patents or even the drive to push for such actions. No one’s going to pay for a god damn ship to ship barrier around the entire United States and carry out searches of every single little boat that comes passing by. It’s bad for other businesses. What money is going to go to fund law enforcement, agriculture, education, and other aspects of society that need attention when all that shit is going to gun control. And the fact the U.S. is $18.1 trillion in debt doesn’t help either.
Unless you do shit like this you can’t even THINK about disarming actual citizens. So my answer to the Australian gun ban: They were underfunded and ill equipped to do a good enough job. Just like the US. Plus, once again, no one cares enough. Everyone in this country is so gun obsessed thinking they need to have them in order to be cool. Because people think guns are just as awesome as video games and want to be the next fucken Duke Nukem. Or they stupidly think that more guns are going to protect them from guns.
But I guess it’s true. If someone wants to kill a fucker enough they’ll jump through hoops. But honesty the words “why bother to change” really gets under my fucken skin. Would you rather have gun homicides and mass shootings dropped by an acceptable 50% or a measly little 17%. Which would make you and you kids feel safer?
So why bother? Because of a few of your friends who are too afraid to leave there houses maybe. Your son you’re daughter to be free of the possibility of school shootings? I don’t know I could see a lot of things out there that could be a potential motivator for getting guns off the streets. But that is just my dumb ass
Since we’re allowed our open carry rights we can take down rampaging murderers easier.
I can’t believe people are so cowardly to think they have to have a gun to take down a crazy person or be the crazy person. Take what happened in china with a guy who recently attack and injured 8 children. Here watch the video:
Most of you mother fuckers seem to think a gun would’ve been the best solution to this. First of all did you notice that there was only one adult in that entire playground? (Unless you count the psychopath as an adult in which case I wish death upon you. That’s not an adult that’s a god damn Psycho) Where is the rapid response of the numerous adults that SHOULD have been on the playground watching the kids? Do the Chinese not take the protection of their kids seriously? Was the school understaffed?
Plus it’s a guy with a fucken butcher knife! Tell the kids to run, have adults surround him, get him into a compromising position, come up behind him, dog pile him, have the other adults help restrain him. No need for a fire arm. You just need at least five or six people with training in close quarters and a few tactics. What’s the problem? To fucken poor or lazy to learn some fucken martial arts? Cause god knows pointing a gun and pulling a god damn trigger is a lot less tiring. Lazy pricks! Honestly in my opinion if you are too scared to get up close and personal with the guy you want to kill – weather he’s an assailant or the victim – you are a coward and shouldn’t even try. Just run like the scared little bitch you are. It’s right up there with sucker punching if you ask me.
What about hunters or skeet shooting? Guns are for sport to you know!
There are the stupid little things I could say to you in regards to this. Like the fact you’re so fucken boring and narrow minded as to not find another hobby that it’s pathetic. And why the fuck would you want to go to the god damn trouble of hunting you’re food? For sport? Play fucken Football! Lots of tough douchey guys play that and it’s not a gun related sport. Are you really such a narrow minded fuck and an out doorsy exercise freak that hiking or mountain climbing just ain’t enough.
And if you’re one of those hermits in the hill types and live in a fucken cabin too far away for grocery shopping your most likely to fucken poor to pay for the utilities and mortgage let alone a god damn hunting rifle. Trust me I lived in the boonies for 12 years. My parents were stressed with money to the point we started selling weed to pay the bills. But then again I guess if you’re a socially awkward hermit far away from larger collections of people it’s not a big deal. If that’s the case you’re really the only one at risk. Just don’t bring that shit to the big cities and fuck them over.
You’re a pussy or not a “real man” if you dislike/don’t own guns.
Oh wow! Your right! Just because I don’t want to own a tool meant souly for taking the lives of other people means I’m a totally weak. I should get a sex change then buy a wig and dress because I’m a total fag. And given the fact I’ve beat the crap out of two separate home invaders without a gun means I’m a total sissy. Shame on my white ass! Women shouldn’t feel safe with me at all because I can take down a guy with a knife with my bare hands or a taser rather than a fire arm. I’m destined to never getting any pussy once so ever because I don’t need something so many other guys need to feel confident in order to win a fight. Some big guy out there should totally fucken pussy whip me.
* * * * *
I’m sure you might think I’m contradicting myself by writing this gay little list. After all I said I love it when people die yet I’m ranting about how guns should be banned. Truth be told, I just love to fuck with the dumb pricks who honestly think guns are absolutely necessary in order to live happily in society. Like you can’t have fun or be a complete person without using guns. And to the people who think there a tough guy or a smarty pants by using ranged tools to kill/hurt someone they don’t like – when such things should be done face to face and fair and square with bare hands. Can you really call yourselves things like “brave” and “strong”? Get real!
But you know what. It’s all good. Because in the eyes of a person like me who can’t stand peoples stupidity, knowing that people like these are being killed is like therapy sessions to me. It makes me feel better knowing that morons are dying. Like I said, guns and gun owners are doing me a favor.
It’s like Comedy Central watching news reports like this. Watching people die because they just have to keep guns around is no different than watching Saturday Night Live for me. I just wrote this to point out more stupidity to be honest. I like explaining why people get on my nerves and why I laugh at them when death and tragedy befalls them. And bullets to their biscuits are the best medicine for these human baboons.
If you found this post entertaining please subscribe for more misanthropic hatred and idiocy and as always I’ll see you in my next post…or not.
Fell like discussing the topic with my freak ass?